Things that +-24 year old guys should know about their female counter-parts

This might be long, I honestly got carried away so my bad if you feel that it’s long, but understand that I write books hey so ummm ya let’s carry on…

As a guy, you're either about to have an "aha" moment or you will agree because it would then mean you're a real nigga & not a bitch nigga. Real niggas have thought about the things I’m about to share.

Warning: Please also don't read this if you're happy in an [engagement] & are planning to get married to your amazing girl. This note is for men in the battle of Troy.
I said stop reading!! Ok cool, not my fault what you decide…

Note: Bear also in mind that I'm not an angry individual or anything silly like that. I love life & happily unapologetic about it, so (((BOOM))). I've also had great relations & connections with girls throughout my life regardless of the turn out, I know they can attest to it. I'm a great guy & they know it too. So this note isn't anything against them or about them but just some observations my busy mind has reminded me of. It's simply a generalization which means that exceptions do exist. This note is for my niggas out there in the struggle.

I write this because I've realized that guys aren't equipped in terms of knowledge when it comes to girls. Double standards and society has made us accept certain things about our opposite counter parts without us questioning or analyzing shit. I just understand girls & their psyche & I think every guy out there should for their own protection. But let me share.

Firstly let me start off with some statistics just to bring [reality] into perspective:

I think it’s important that you know that 95% of people
eventually get married, (yay!)

Or that 95% of the country practices pre-marital sex,

Or that only 14% of men are over 6 feet tall.

And 5% makes over a million rand per annum.

(Where I got all that, I read!! something more guys should do)

Anyway... hopefully statistics have helped set the tone. Now, what we as guys must understand is that women are smarter than us, some of them know it but most don't. Have you ever stopped to think how much research girls actually do on us? How many magazines are out there for women talking about you guessed it!! Us?! Cosmo, Glamor, Elle & the list goes on, oh & don't forget horoscopes (I don't know why but that shit is 80% accurate). While we're outchea reading business books, watching sport, playing Fifa and what not, they are studying us & gathering intel on us, their enemy. In Sun Tzu's art of war he says:  "know yourself & know your enemy & you will always come out victorious." Yup my point about them being better is proved, because there are no magazines for us to learn about them, why? Because we have egos, pride & never want to admit weakness, which exacerbates our lack of strength in this regard. Guys learn by experience & great mates around them, while the rest are lost to doing the buying drinks thing & seeking approval from these viciously equipped women. But let’s move on, the introduction is done...

Let's introduce a concept called the "Sexual market value" (it measures desirability) or SMV, yup your Ecos 1 just got awakened. I wish I could put a graph here but bear with me. I want you to understand that a girls SMV starts at 16 and increases gradually & peaks at 20, 21 before it declines & drops a whole lot  by the time she's around 25. This is because of 2 reasons, they simply lose their hotness (bodies change preparing for motherhood), & new entrants to the female market with higher SMV’s makes them old meat & they simply can't compete. By age 28 they exit the market by force. Remember that their clocks have been ticking and they will at this stage probably have kids. Drake did say “I guess life sometimes forces us to calm down.”

Guys on the other hand have their SMVs start properly at about 21; increase gradually, flattening and then increasing again to peak at about 32 at which it then decreases (at a slow rate) & plateaus till they exit at about 60 &  then turn into those creepy old men. Now let's go deeper.

--- Enter Newton’s 3rd law of motion, about action & reaction. ---

I think what’s important to note is that the older you get as a guy, you don't all of a sudden only form an attraction base for girls your age, as we've been duped to believe. You still are attracted to younger girls, so if girls have high SMVs in their early 20s.... yup you guessed it. Older guys go for the younger girls but don't date them. They will mostly date mature women but will definitely sleep with loads of younger girls whose attention we’re trying to get and keep. How do they do it? They provide a lifestyle for these high SMV’d girls that they buy into (will explain this later when I talk about attraction bases). Have you seen how many of these girls you were in varsity with, with a similar financial limitation (being a student), could always afford dresses and these crazy social lives being out weekend after weekend? Yup! Them older niggas who have high SMVs that own clubs and all these companies they work for were gripping those brawds with high SMVs you were busy trying to wife or pull a Gatsby for. Newton 3 at its best & you honestly would have no idea about it all. Once again, some girls did get their own or had rich dads but don’t get caught up in that for now.

It's also important to note that it is highly likely that a 23 year old girl has probably had more sexual partners than a guy that age & did it in secret. Yup whenever a guy tells you his number, divide it by 3. When a girl tells you her number, multiply it by 3. Haven't you always found it strange that women always say they've been only been with like 3-5 guys ALWAYS! It's extremely rare you find women who admit their true sexual prowess and I absolutely appreciate those girls who don’t bullshit. These girls I speak of are the hot desirable girls that guys like being seen with, the 7s, 8s, 9s & 9.5s (There can be no 10). These insanely hot girls are always invited out to all these gatherings; gym, exclusive parties, clubs, lounges, some are even flown out to God knows where etc meeting highly SMV’d guys and what happens?? GQOOOOM!! Money is means hey...

They can't even help themselves. Why? Because as a guy you tend to eventually know how to press a woman’s attractive switches. & with the crazy amount of bitch niggas out there it's safe to assume they can't resist an outlier of a guy with a high SMV & knows his shit. So these girls are having more sex than you can imagine, then want to come tell you with your low SMV’d self that their number is 5, only because they want to preserve what you think of them. I asked my friends a question the other day; “Men, how many beds does a girl sleep in other than her own in a year compared to guys (not talking about family or friends)??”. They looked at me and said “many!!” Every guy goes out subconsciously to meet a girl. Some go out with intentions to take a girl home, some hope to & a lot (with high SMVs) actually succeed. I think on a subconscious level, girls probably do the same, but they’ll have to confirm that with me (I don’t know everything!). It's actually impossible that their numbers can be as low as they claim especially if they've been single. Girls who date a lot actually keep their numbers low because girls don't really cheat like guys do. Guys cheat because of opportunity and it really doesn’t mean anything to us. But the girls who are single & are "exclusive" with at least 3 guys in a year make it obvious as to how their numbers can sky rocket during their high SMV’d years ( & bear in mind those older guys don’t want to date them). Think about it this way, [Every time a guy has sex, a girl has sex, so if one groups numbers increase, the other also increases, they are indeed, perfect complementary interactions.] I always ask girls a question that makes them Mal-function for a bit: “Who’s better? A girl who sleeps with 10 random guys in a year, or a girl that dates 10 different guys in a year and sleeps with them all?” Try it out, the responses are always funny. But anyway, what I realized is that girls only include sexual encounters they COUNT as a sexual encounter. So they’ll always include guys they dated and exclude the one night stands they shouldn’t have had, her best friends boyfriend or ex and the list goes on... but I think it’s good to never ask a girl you’re with, what her number is, she’ll most probably lie to you.

So now how does it all work?? It’s important to understand that girls and guys with high SMV’s have more than many options which means they always have someone ready to call. When Beyonce sang “Irreplaceable, to the left, to the left wada wada wada...” SHE WASN’T LYING! Girls with high SMVs can have you replaced easily especially if you become complacent or simply just aren’t exciting enough. The funny thing is that girls will always keep backup guys around in their lives in case things go bad for them. You know that girl who keeps calling you at random times who thinks you’ll do anything for her when she needs you. She does it just to remain relevant in your life, nobody wants someone to get over them, even if they don’t wanna be with you. I call this the landing strip theory, basically that guy they keep around, feed him just enough to stick around in case they need an emergency landing strip. Guys in their early 20s are behind because they have a limited access to resources (once again, money is means) and their SMV only starts to increase rapidly the more they progress in terms of their career i.e. money.

After girls have peaked, have had a couple of sexual experiences and dropped in terms of their SMV, they become all serious, career orientated, turn to God and church (to become reformed hoes) and seek marriage and hopefully try lock that bad boy in. I think it’s at this stage in their lives where they put pressure on each other to have a serious boyfriend. If they don’t succeed with the bad boy, they then turn to the ever ready landing strip who will think that his luck has changed has she comes dashing back into his life as his career is taking off. This is called the marriage zone.... DO NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO GET CAUGHT, YOU’RE ONLY ABOUT TO START PEAKING!

I think it’s also imperative to note that girls have 4 main attractors to guys:

1. Fame - Not because he’s famous but because his PR drives up his SMV and more girls want him. Simple demand and supply theories.
2. Money - Money is means and to girls that means lifestyle. Girls watch the Kardashians, Top Billing and all that stuff and buy into a dream, a guy with money can fulfill. They say money is a man’s plastic surgery)
3. Personality – Personality is the ultimate with girls although it’s sad that it takes so much time to actually get here, waaay after our previous attractors have kicked in.
4. Looks – good looks can get a guy many one night stands if he can just include 20% personality to keep attention but over the medium run or long run he’ll bore a girl to death and he even won’t count as a sexual encounter. Pretty boys shouldn’t count on looks, you’ll lose to number 3 if he knows what he’s doing. Women are feelers, and personality takes her on an emotional train she gets addicted to. Why do you think women love soapies, the bachelor and other girly reality shows, and novels? (Remember that 50 shades of Gray shit?!!).

You need to understand that famous guys (especially DJs and Artists) and guys with money are cleaning out these girls with high SMVs we all find attractive, especially if they’re out there a lot (Newton 3 once again)... Not everyone can be famous and famous people create barriers to entry to their circles, but this is all in the mind once again and it works pretty well until guys who get it, get on the scene.

When it comes to famous girls however, understand that they have extremely high SMVs but there’s really nothing special about them. Just remember that celebrities are brands, which means that they are concerned about one thing, PR!! Their market and people around them operate with the use of perception. Have you not wondered why these music videos and events of theirs promote them having extremely high SMV’s and as a result unattainable, when the reality is that a vast majority of them get freebies and are actually near broke relative to others (especially in SA). They are normal girls with squared SMVs in their minds but normal nonetheless. Guys just get intimidated and don’t even think they stand a chance and as a result leave them to the higher SMV’d men out there. But I think guys just tend to assume that celebrity girls are the cleanest, can do no wrong and only want to get married. That goes to show just how good their PR campaigns are. They just do their shit under wraps to be honest. I’ve with some highly SMV’d girls and truth be told they are just the same as every other girl. They want a guy to listen and understand them. If you allow a girl the freedom to be herself around you at all times, and I mean that boundary-less type of communication that isn’t defined by time or anything, she’ll stick with you. The same goes for celebrity girls as hot as they are, they also gotta get theirs hey, just keep that in mind. Break them down in your mind and the rest is easy...

To get to a conclusion, the point of all this is for guys to understand that it’s all really about the type of guy you are and what you want. If you wanna play around, play around.  If you’re the soft type, make sure you don’t end up as a landing strip (nice guys finish last). Don’t be nice with nice tendencies; be nice with some asshole tendencies, that’s all. Too many guys are getting married to too soon because they fear they will never meet anyone special, and society and church doesn’t help with that either. Don’t be that guy who rushes into marriage too soon before you peak and peak when you’re in your marriage because the thirst will grip you. I don’t know what my thoughts on marriage are but I know that if I get married, I want to have lived and will not cheat on my wife. I understand the idea of marriage and what they tried to achieve and I think you can only achieve that if you make it your own and not allow dogma to decide for you. Give yourself time to peak, let your career take off and enjoy the fullness of yourself. Too many people are incomplete out there and seek others to complete them. Be the shit to you and then find a person who’s the shit to them and then let the shit hit the fan!! There are waaaay too many girls in the world to stress yourself about them now as society wants us to do, remember you peak in your 30s. When girls tell you you’re getting old and must find someone, simply look at her and tell her BITCH IM ABOUT TO PEAK!! Haha (ok the word “bitch” was for dramatic effect) anyway, allow yourself to grow into yourself, be interesting because there are too many boring people in this world and also take the time to understand women and more importantly, their dreams and ambitions and enjoy life and time. Don’t allow another guy to be there for her and her dreams because you will lose. Our biggest problems are always tied to our dreams, and if a guy arrives as a knight in shining armor, I repeat, you WILL LOSE.

If you’re a guy now pursuing a girl or trying to build a life for her to come into, understand that it was never your job to prove your worth to someone else. If they see it they see it, if they don’t, they don’t, don’t be too available. Tell a girl how you feel when it gets insane, if she’s not there for you, just walk away. It’s imperative that you always understand and operate under your worth. Remember you haven’t peaked yet whereas she has. So all the girls who are basically stressing us out right now have highly lowered SMV’s whereas yours is about to take off, don’t forget that. This also applies to girls you’ve lost and maybe want to get back. Listen to Drake’s “Club Paradise”, he says “They say that all your old girls got somebody new...” Your old girls will move on, they’ll still think about you and how you used to make them feel but that is it. You’re entering your peak now and should never focus on getting back with an ex lover especially out of fear of not loving someone else. In fact never get back with an ex who wants you back, they tried to do better than you but couldn’t. So focus on you and your shit and that’s all you should really focus on, the universe is at work, you’ll always be able to find someone, even at 50 because you’re a guy! You only have one life and all you have to do is enjoy this shit nothing else....

*Share if you think it’ll help our fellow soldiers out there*

[Rather we live!!]

The turbulence of Greatness

I start off with quite a powerful picture quote because of its relevance to the title. I know we’ve all heard or read about people achieving greatness in one way or the other and we’ve all marveled as we accepted putting these people on a pedestal. The question I asked myself however is why we call these people great, I mean anybody can do or create something that’s great. Everyone great created/did something but not everyone who created/did something is classified as great. So the question once again is what makes a person who creates or does something great? This question isn’t easy to answer but I guess I wouldn’t be a writer if I didn’t at least attempt to answer the question. Let’s take a look at something interesting that I recently Googled when I was thinking of how this post would be structured:

I researched the 100m record progression over the years (bear in mind that Usain Bolts record now stands at 9.58 seconds). 

We see from the data that the first record was set by D. Lippincott of the USA at 10.6s in 1912, that human beings only ran sub 10 seconds as of 1968 by J. Hines of the US who ran a 9.9 and that’s all progressed to the 9.58 seconds we have now. We have 40 recorded world records from 30 something individuals in over a century in which we’ve only managed to shave just over an entire second for the event. That’s some pretty interesting shit if you really sit and think about it. The funny thing about it all is that these men were all considered to be the fastest men in the world and deemed to be great until someone came along and shattered their record. Greatness in this case was to be able to go faster than what others did. 

What I question however is what it took for a person to shave off a hundredth of a second. I mean I’m no 100m runner but I can imagine that at that level, everything matters. From what you eat, your training, what you wear daily to what haircut you have on the day of the race. For all these men, the question had to be, “what does the record holder do to be that fast so I can do it and what do I have to innovate or add to what he does so I can be faster,” classic art of war; “Know yourself and know your enemy & you’ll come out victorious.” I’m guessing they probably get Mckinsey or other researchers filled with Economists and Sports Scientists to research any correlation between anything and the top speed of a human being (I know I’m going crazy with this now but my mind is blown) and then apply it because nobody is born running sub 10 second times. They applied all the things they were told to, regardless of what they had to go through with a goal in mind for however long till the day of the race. If they panicked they then resorted to steroids which would only make sense. I mean if you have been doing everything in your power to beat a specific time which you’re nowhere near beating at practice, what can you do other than to turn to steroids? In any case, race day comes and someone wins, and maybe someone breaks the record and that's basically how it happens. 

Now greatness, in an objective sense, is a pre-determined goal that either exists or doesn’t, in which case you have to pave a new way. I think Donald Trump said it perfectly when he said “hitting a target nobody can hit is talent, hitting a target nobody can see is genius.” Greatness is going further than what those before you did. Greatness is doing something that nobody has done before, the stuff they said was impossible until someone came along and did it. Nobody can tell you what goes into being great but what we do however know is that it is a status reserved for only a few. 

In my journey, I wanted to be about doing new things and breaking whole new grounds because that’s who I’ve always been throughout my life. They call me a serial entrepreneur now because that’s what they call someone who is creatively gifted but also has the acumen and know how to follow through to completion. But what I’ve encountered is the turbulence that goes into being great. I had no intention of being great in the beginning, I just had ideas I believed strongly in and decided to pursue. The demons that I’ve seen in the process of bringing them to life have brought me as close to hell as I think I can ever come so much so that I think I should be exempt from going there now. So many days that make you want to quit, days you want to stop existing because this idea now owns every facet of your life. You see the idea all around you and it grows faster in your mind than it does in reality and that’s when you begin to realize just how much goes into things we use every day and take for granted. 

It all comes down to how much you want to do that very thing you want to do. In the realization of a dream, it all comes down to how many hurdles the individual can jump that determines the level of greatness that dream exhibits. In other words, it’s all about where your pain threshold is and when you can’t go on. Great people have to be great within themselves before they are great to the people of the world. I sought out the definition of a marathon and I got an interesting one; “A long-lasting or difficult task or activity.” The reason marathons are so difficult is because of the amount of people that don’t make it to the finish line & that’s what gives finishing a marathon that prestige that it has.This is the same for many awards and positions we hold high in society.The narrow routes have always been avoided by the many but some very few decided to soldier on.

In my journey I’ve been tested but what has kept me going was my passion and energy for what I was doing. Anybody can do anything great but it’s all about how long a person can hold onto a dream or an idea and in my experience, not everyone can. Too many people take on things that they don’t really want to do only to quit somewhere along the line. We quit the wrong things at the wrong times before those things we wanted to do become a habit. I think it was Aristotle who said: "We are what we repeatedly do, excellence is then not an act but a habit." Once again nobody can tell you what goes in between the person you were and the person you [deliberately] decide to become. Achieving a dream is a dark, cold and lonely road which I’ve come to accept and experience and has prompted me to write this to you today. 

My advice to anyone out there going through turbulence to achieve a dream is that you understand that all the hardships are pre-requisites of greatness otherwise everyone would be doing it. You don’t see anyone being great for doing something everybody can do, it’s all about being able to go further than where others quit. It’s all about wanting something so bad that whatever you have to go through to get there is of no concern to you. So as Seth Godin says: “Don’t start something unless you’ve invested what it takes to see it through to the end.” I guess that’s why they say you have to want success more than your desire to quit. 

You will grow, you will get beat, you will be ridiculed, you will be abandoned and you will want to quit but if you hold on you’re forced to achieve your dream, it’s a universal law as real as gravity on some Newton 3 tip. You will feel like the world is against you and even worse, nobody will understand what you're going through but don’t lose hope, keep going, that is the turbulence of greatness, you either make it out or you don’t, but nobody can tell you what goes into it, only your dream can take you there and show you but it’s all on you to hold on for dear life when you get there!

Drake - "Say what's real" 

Figured I'd add this for all the GOONERS out there!!!!!!!!!!! We did it!!!

From Student to Entrepreneur. 22 priceless things I learnt.

I’ve been getting asked by a number of people who are looking to be entrepreneurs regarding the entrepreneurial journey. I love the fact that the first thing all of them seem to ask is “What are the challenges like” or “How tough is it?” as opposed to “How fun/cool is it?” 

So it all got me thinking of my journey, so much so that I went to my journal to reflect on all the dormant but forgotten emotions & experiences I went through in the past 2 years and what I found was rather interesting. You have to understand that I went from being a student, finishing with an Economic Science major that I didn’t care about, so much so that I didn’t even bother with the graduation ceremony. I guess something greater was repelling it all and leading me to other unexplored shores. So I decided to write a post that speaks about things I’ve learnt and someone will learn as they make a huge transition from playing it safe to taking the risks required to an internally directed & successful life. What people must understand is that being an entrepreneur is just a word we use for a person who just has a vision inside of him/her to create/do something for other people that ends up making money ( some French dude coined the word in the 1800s). The same principles I’m about to mention apply to any path of high resistance that a person undertakes, almost like the decision to lose weight, move cities, change jobs etc. This is just me sharing experiences that I went through in my life that should by no means be duplicated, instead take what I went through and somehow transform it so that it matters to you...

Disclaimer: Extremely low amounts of bullshit are found in this article. Not for sensitive readers, if you’re sensitive & love bullshit then stop reading!!

*Your honour I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me God* hahaha!

1. Your Primary Aim/Outcome/vision.

“A victorious person wins & then goes to war; a defeated person goes to war and then hopes to win.” – Sun Tzu 

Regardless of what any person decides to do in life, the most important thing of all is the primary aim/outcome/vision. You have to have a clear picture of the destination before you embark on a journey, otherwise how will you know what needs to be done? More importantly you have to have the end goal in mind but must also know the signs or feelings that signal your proximity to the end goal otherwise you’re really just wasting your time taking risks that lead nowhere. So ask yourself, what do I really want? What kind of life do I want? And if the destination has been found, set course and be on your way Swimple! [Simple + swift = Swimple]

2. All the quotes by people in history regarding “Success” are true. 

I’ve come to understand this major point in a very sobering way. I came to realize that people who have the time and conviction to write about achieving success are simply sharing something they are living and helped them achieve it. Nobody just writes something for no reason because people write things down that matter to them, so if that something ends up being a popular quote then best believe it’s true. How many picture quotes or quotes do you just retweet/share as opposed to absorbing or applying? People love the feelings they derive by these quotes & the “likes” they’ll receive by sharing and never apply them, I think it makes them feel/seem smart but anyway Trust me, they are TRUE!!

3. Innovation 

 

Understand that there’s a difference between being a business person and being an entrepreneur. A business person finds something to sell and acts as a transactor or middle man between two people. An entrepreneur [creates] something new and useful for the people that is derived from a need or gap he/she saw. Innovation has unlimited forms and can come from anywhere, but it is a prerequisite for being an entrepreneur. Build/create something with love for the people that solves a problem or improves their lives. I was once told by an exceptional girl while we were walking in the mall that stores simply don’t give people an experience anymore and that’s what she wants to do. Those words changed my life that day although I doubt she realizes it. Don’t imitate, Innovate!

4. Passion > Money

Passion is the single greatest force that i’ve come to understand and embrace. Never do something with money as your primary goal because there’ll be many days in your journey that will look like you’re never gonna make money and that’s where passion is needed to get you through. Passion is a force multiplied and even though money is a great motivator, it sadly isn’t a propulsion force; so chase the dream and let the money chase you. It’s all about persistence and grit. Passion will help you hold on because that’s what it comes down to. You can’t do anything great without passion.  

5. It’s all about trying!

They say that making the decision to try takes you 50% of the way there. Now that we know that all these things “they” say are true, I think we’re done here. 

6. Fear Vs Danger

 I watched a lame movie with Will Smith and his son in it, forgot what it was called, but I found the underlying fight against fear to be rather intriguing. There was a part that where he explains the difference between fear and danger; he said that danger is very real whereas fear is all in the mind. When you see a tiger you run because it is a dangerous animal; but failure, debt & ridicule are all fears that are in the mind. If you understand quantum physics and maybe embrace the multiverse theory then you’ll know that something like failure is only [ONE] outcome of an infinite amount of possibilities and your mind chooses to focus on it but you have to overcome it. I’ll go as far as saying: “If it can’t kill you then that feeling you have is bullshit!”

7. Temporary Sacrifices

They say: “When you gain a vision for your life, you lose your friends.” The thing you have to understand is that there are major [temporary] sacrifices you have to make. If you can’t make them then you sadly won’t make it out. You have to understand that things like partying, socializing and love fly out the window for a bit. You can’t afford to be caring about concepts like Friday or December because those are simply destinations for average people. Remember that you are building a life that will allow you to do whatever the fuck you want whenever you want to do it with whoever, wherever. People who are too afraid to let go of comforts of life to achieve greatness, will never make it. Be ready to lower your expenses, shop less, less take outs & less of a good time with normal people out there. (You’ll end up being a good cook lol!) 

8. Time (80% reduction of TV, entertainment i.e. Distractions)

There’s one excuse I hear a lot from people who have full time jobs but have ideas and want to branch off towards their own businesses and that excuse is: “I don’t have enough time.” Ummmm ok... sorry to burst your bubble, we all have 24 hours hey, what makes us different is how we choose to spend those 24 hours. They complain about not having time, yet they want waste their time watching series upon series, partying and all that bullshit that’s simply put there to distract you. I had to choose and reduce what I watch because I understood what was at stake, so I settled to watching Suits, Naruto (anime) and maybe 1 or 2 other shows, because there’ll be days you have to escape. If people wanted to go out and I didn’t want to go out, I stayed home, regardless of what they said to me, I figured fuck them, I’m tryna be great!

9. Accepting yourself 

Here’s something interesting, we are all already different so it’s not about trying to be different, it’s all about [accepting] yourself, your difference & acting on it. If people call you weird or strange, then you’re doing it right, the right people will stay and the wrong people will leave, laugh at you, talk shit about you, but secretly admire you. You will begin to distance yourself from a lot of people and that’s also ok. Society rules people with a low self-esteem and they’re all unknowingly pessimistic, so you have to distance yourself from people like that, especially the ones with fancy jobs who think they understand business when they actually don’t know shit. You’ll notice how your reality starts to clash with people and that’s also a good sign. When they love Friday, hate Monday, love public holidays & wait for December and you love Monday, hate Friday, hate public holidays and couldn’t care less about December then you know you’re on your way. Time is really an illusion so spend time alone, listen to your inner voice and let that be your one and only guide.

10. Put yourself out there and open yourself up to variety

 What I’ve seen is that we naturally are social beings that have a need to always meet new people yet once again our great friend “society” has instilled this fear into us that paralyzes us. It defines people as introverts and extroverts which is all once again a silly concept because even “introverts” know people. If they really were introverts they wouldn’t know people. So we’re all “extroverts” we just have different degrees of it. Never be afraid to put yourself out there, go to a bar alone and have a drink while talking with people. Variety is intelligence to me & the more things you open yourself up to, the more your mind learns to adapt and mix ideas. So if you’re black, go to white parties and vice versa, sure we are culturally different but we are fundamentally similar and those differences are actually fascinating. Date a black, white, yellow or purple girl/guy, life is too short and too exciting to stick to what you know always.

11. Network

“You’re only as effective as your network.”

“Your network determines your net-worth.” 

This point goes with the previous one, but it needed its own title because this is probably the one thing you have control over that will ensure your success. Everything you need is sitting in the minds of people around you and more importantly in their phonebooks. Remember & utilize that but don’t steal it, ima use it for my next book!

12. Read & keep a journal

Stop wasting your time with shit that doesn’t matter. Stop reading novels & bestsellers (well temporary) because they don’t help anything but build your literacy skills and let’s face it, you passed English in high school long ago. Go get yourself books from people who went in the same directions you’re afraid of going in. Get books on things that fascinate you, on the life you want to live and experience. Once again, switch the TV off and party less, you can watch all the TV you want on your yacht and throw the best parties on it too, but for now read shit that matters to you and your journey. When reading business books also try not to follow them blindly, different businesses mean different experiences and there’s like a 0,00000000001% chance that you’ll go through what they went through so make what you read your own. I make sure I read at least 5 articles I somehow find on the net and read at least 2 books a month.

“Not all readers are leaders, but all leaders are readers”

Keeping a journal is also extremely important because it lets your mind know that what it thinks & experiences is important enough to take time and document. Think of your mind as its own personality that talks to you, and if you treat it like someone important enough for you make notes on what it thinks, it simply won’t stop talking & sharing its deepest thoughts and secrets with you. Trust yourself and the power of your ideas!

13. Music

 

“Music is what feelings sound like”

I don’t know how much people value music but music got me through some really terrible and dark days. I don’t know why music has the mood altering power it has but make music your best friend throughout the journey because it will change your frowns into smiles. And once again embrace all kinds of music, don’t be too black or white just live!

14. Be ready for all kinds of bullshit, stress and lack of sleep

 

Life never goes according to plan so why should business or your dreams be any different. There’ll be days where you literally want to shoot yourself and everything in the room with a chain-gun because things will frustrate you to a point of no return. You’ll lose and gain weight, lose sleep and have mood swings like a pregnant woman who’s expecting triplets but once again this is another reason why you need passion & music, they will get you through. Remember: “What you’re going through is preparing you for what you asked for or wanted.” Exercising is also a must.

15. Changes

“People will look at you strange saying you’ve changed as if you worked so hard to stay the same” – Jay-Z

I am under the belief that a human being changes one for one with the experiences he/she faces. Think of experiences and changes as perfectly complementary goods (It’s good to know that my Economic Science degree wasn’t such a waste) and so if point 14 made you aware of the many experiences you will go through then imagine the changes. That’s right, you’re gonna change more times weekly than Kim Kardashians lovers. You’re going to become harder towards society, somewhat insensitive, have a low tolerance for weak people and their problems, girls with no ambition won’t interest you anymore, you’ll become more enlightened, want to spend more time alone or with people that matter, become a control freak, love life and become more curious. You’ll be going through things and making decisions that your corporate friends will only be able to make in 20 years of service, that shit will change you. 

16. Self education

Eventually you realize that what we learnt in formal education was simply a waste of time because we were not taught how to deal with world the way it truly is. So it’s on you to learn shit that nobody is willing to pay you to learn. Average people believe that information they come into contact with is enough and they’ll even pat themselves on the back whenever they watch the Discovery channel or Nat Geo. But to you who want to be great, it isn’t so. Your journey forces you to read more, be more observant, think more & understand more. Think of yourself as being a superhero, and nobody is simply born one; you make yourself one unless you are Tony Stark or Toby McGuire.  Entrepreneurship is an extreme sport!

17. Friends that matter

Society will tell you that going into business with your friends is suicide, but if you’re young and people you know are young then what must you do? Thank goodness that I have a good friend called Sun Tzu who wrote “The Art of war” and said: “When you have means but are not getting anywhere, seek appropriate associates, and you will be lucky.” And “A small army that has achieved fullness and a singular purpose will destroy a large army that has achieved emptiness and a mismatched purpose.”  I went into business with my friends and it’s been the best thing ever because we want the same thing and work equally as hard to achieve the goal. We’re invested in risk and reward and have done amazingly well thus far. 

18. Build something and create a value preposition.

“Entrepreneurs must build something and then seek funding.” – Unknown

 A lot people whom I meet & set up their businesses, will tell me that they have ideas and require funding from somewhere and complain that there is no funding. When I ask further, I find that they haven’t even written a business plan or developed a working prototype and basically want someone else to take on all the risk. Understand that it is your job to alleviate the risks of possible investors and that they don’t see what’s in your head. They care about how much you’ve done, the numbers and how much of your own money you’ve put in, so create something of value before you seek investors. You have to bootstrap (a term that means funding a start-up yourself until you seek investors) by asking your friends and family for funds by making them believe in your vision. 

19. Expectations and timelines.

“You will always have plans and they will work out if you keep at them, but remember that your plans will not always go according to your timeline.” – My Dad

Let the story write itself in its own time, you do all that you have to and let a force greater than yourself do the rest. I think we’re done here. 

20. Shut out the noise from people and their fears.

 

“The opposite of courage in our society is conformity not fear.”

People are afraid of following their dreams and will make excuses for not going after them and you sadly have to distance yourself from them. Success is not about how much money you make or how prestigious your job is, fact of the matter is that you will know when you’re not where you’re supposed to be regardless of how much you bullshit yourself. I read somewhere: “Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal,” so basically a person who is [deliberately] doing a pre-determined job that he decided to do [deliberately]. So in the face of it all, it’s all about saying to yourself: “This is want I want and I’m gonna go after it, regardless of what society says.”

21. Share your experiences and story with people.

 

I personally think that ideas choose people who they believe can bring them to life. The whole point of ideas is to improve humanity and help each other because that’s what it all comes down to. So don’t be afraid to share your deepest thoughts on whatever platform you use because your story and your words have the power to change lives and unleash people you don’t know. I remember this girl once telling me shit for not posting my FB status updates anymore, she was like: “Lui, I don’t know why you stopped updating your facebook status. There are people you don’t know who wake up and want to know what you have to say because it helps them so you can’t afford to not share your thoughts when you have them. You’ve been blessed with an exceptional mind and so you can’t not share what’s on it!” I was so deeply moved...

Now here I am... so start a blog, YouTube channel or twitter account and share.. Catch me on Twitter @Lui_Innovator. 

22. Have fun, make mistakes, break the rules and live!

 

“Move fast & break things” – Marc Zuckerberg

“Stay hungry, stay foolish!” – Steve Jobs

The most important point has to be this one. I guess I went through a lot, changed a lot and cried a lot, but I knew every day that we were having fun. We were creating something new and that’s really all that matters. If you’re not having fun, stop what you’re doing and do something else, it’s not worth it. Understand that in today’s world, not taking a risk is the biggest risk of all so understand that this is your life and you’re only here once so while you still have time, take risks, make mistakes but most importantly live!!! 

                                                              

                                                                              
                                                                 

 

                                                 

 

@Lui_Innovator That's me, I look cool don't I?? haha